Waiting, waiting and more waiting.

Béziers, France

1 November 2024

Dear Family and Friends,

I hope you are enjoying Fall!  The change of season happened quickly here. I love fall, but it does mean that some of my expat buddies are leaving for the next six months.  Before Rupert and Katie left, Katie and I finally made it to Chateau Laurens in Agde.  We had been trying for a couple of months, but every attempt was foiled.  It was worth the wait. It’s a truly fascinating Chateau built by a young man who suddenly inherited a vast amount of wealth in 1894.

A plate warmer in the radiator was one of the many fun features of opulence.

I wrote last time that I was exchanging my driver’s license. Mom asked, does that mean your thinking of getting a car. Well, no it doesn’t but let me explain a little further.  There are many states that have reciprocal agreements with France, which means that you can exchange your driving license without having to take the driving test (in French). Illinois is a state with the reciprocal agreement. The rule when I came to France was that you had to wait six months before you could apply for the exchange, and you must exchange your license within the first twelve months of residency. I understand that you can now begin the process when you arrive in France; however, it remains that if you wait longer than twelve months you will need to take the test! I therefore decided it was better to go ahead and exchange my driver’s license. I’m still trying to do this without a car.

There is no doubt that life is less expensive without a car, but it does have it’s challenges. A word to the wise, not having a car means you spend a lof more time waiting.  Waiting, waiting and more waiting.  I do a lot of that here. As my friends in the states without cars will attest, you don’t want to be a burden to your friends, so you don’t constantly ask for rides here there and everywhere.  What you do is wait for the bus, shop on line and wait for delivery, you walk a mile or two to shop at the store, you take a train to that town you want to visit, or you find a bus to the small town that doesn’t have a train station. All of these things are doable, but they are not second nature, especially because I am an American who has lived most of my adult life in a major metropolitan area.

 Not all the waiting is related to life without a car.  For example, the driving license application could take six month or more to process. The application for residency for the next year could also take more than six months… interesting note, you are not allowed to start the process of applying for your second year of residency until you are four months from the expiration date of your current visa. Yes, you did the math correctly, that means you could be without a residency permit for two or more months even if you meet all the deadlines and answer all of the questions satisfactorily. Frankly, I’m not worried about being deported only because I don’t think they would get around to it in the two months of waiting for the permit. But let’s wait and see, I could be wrong. And in this situation there are things you can do to protect yourself, but I think it’s best to be patient and vigilant first, and if it gets dicey get some expert assistance.

The other thing that I am having to get used to is the difference in delivery expectations and this does add waiting time. In Chicago it seemed as though Amazon would deliver things before I even knew that I wanted them. Here, Amazon is still probably the best at delivering products, but the experience is different. Two-to-three-day delivery is defined as after the seller ships. So if the seller takes two weeks to ship, you’ll get it in two to three days after that. As many of you know, I ordered some couches back in July. At the time I order them, I was told it would be six to eight weeks before I would receive them. They were ready to ship in six weeks. It took four weeks and many failed attempts before they were delivered. This week I order a product online that was supposed to arrive the next day. I was giving an eight hour window for delivery and a link to track my shipment. When it did not come, I contacted customer service the next day. Ultimately, I was told that the shipper had not received the product and I would be contacted via email withing 48 “business hours” with an update on a shipping estimate.

And oh, it’s not just delivery, it’s also pick-up.  The furniture that I was hoping to donate to a local charity was supposed to be picked-up last week.  I had waited six weeks for the scheduled date. On the day before the scheduled pick-up I received a telephone call to confirm that they were coming between 8:30 and 9:00 the next morning. At 9:30 am I received a phone call saying that they didn’t have a large enough vehicle to pick up the furniture and they would call to reschedule on Tuesday… haven’t received that call, not waiting for it, I’m looking for other options.

The moral of the story is, if you’re wanting to live the expat life it’s not all sunshine and roses. You need to learn a whole new set of expectations. Role with it, you’re not going to change it.

I hope all is well with you! Thanks for all of your support and well wishes!

Bonne Journée !